Crisis in F.R.E.D.

Some of the other nations around the world have accused us of involvement in international conflicts, while we of course did not really do anything wrong, we would still like to inform our Freddies of what their proud nation has been accused of.

Tensions between Fred and Ebrana rise as Leah Winfield uncovers “secret plot”

Last week, Leah Winfield, an Ebrana-native who had willingly moved to FRED, claimed to have uncovered a plot to get her to move to our country. Of course this is due to the Capitalist way of thinking she was raised with in Ebrana. In reality all that was done to her was getting her a nice husband who happened to be a secret service agent as well. Ms. Winfield moved of her own volition and claimed to be appalled by the requirement that every woman should bear 6 children. This is caused by her faulty mindset induced by years of capitalist indoctrination. Every woman in FRED has had the opportunity to enjoy years of schooling in state schools, causing them to realize that having 6 little Freddies is necessary for the future of our wonderful Republic.

Due to incessant whining at the UBN Council by Aldora Gladwine, Queen of the capitalist Ebranans, our great Comisar Viktor Johnson has invited Queen Gladwine and Ms. Winfield to converse at his personal palace in Ivansky. He intends to give Ms. Winfield a double nationality. A form which would allow her to travel “freely” between Fred and Ebrana. Due to all the greatness Ms. Winfield has enjoyed in our country she will serve as an ambassador spreading the good word of our nation.

We just hope Queen Gladwine’s car tires are well-maintained while driving through the main tunnel into Ivansky.

Fake news: it is not a joke

Just yesterday, F.R.E.D. was caught in an argument between Whenua, Nomen and Ebrana. But fear not, dear Freddies, for this is a great example of Fake news. Fake news is a phenomenon that is tainted by the capitalist mindset of these countries. Of course, F.R.E.D. would never believe this and we handled the situation appropriately.

Whenua, a country across the sea, came out with a story on a spillage of oils and waste in the waters surrounding it. At first it was thought to be a UBN ship, but later UBN came out saying it was a ship under the Nomen flag. Whenua stated that Nomen is responsible for the decontamination of the waters, but Nomen points the accusing finger to our dearest country F.R.E.D. This is clearly false information, because our great country could never be at fault.

To give you an idea of what happened exactly, here is a detailed overview of the events. The Nomen ship came to the coast of F.R.E.D., illegally picking up waste. Nomen authorities claim that they didn’t know the waste was radioactive. However F.R.E.D. had no idea of the nefarious intentions of Nomen.

Because of this debacle, F.R.E.D. was forced into paying large sums of money as compensation. Of course, seeing as the accusations are highly incorrect, F.R.E.D demanded to change this preposterous idea. Our great country decided to be gracious and take care of the crab problem Ebrana was dealing with. As a token of our benevolence, F.R.E.D. gave the crabs to Nomen.

Ebrana also demanded an apology, but as is clearly known, this apology is not necessary. F.R.E.D. did not do anything wrong, because we had no idea what the other countries were doing. In fact, they should have communicated with our great country. Freddies, do not believe this fake news, our country was not at fault.

APOLOGY

Following the incident involving the countries of Whenua, F.R.E.D. , Ebrana and Nomen - sparking a nationwide debate on pollution and radioactive waste disposal - the Fredian government has finally issued a statement and apology to the Ebranian government, code named V.E.W.Y. S.O.W.Y.

“It is our responsibility, both as a nation and as a part of the UBN, to own up to our mistakes, and to prevent incidents - such as the one that has just occurred - to escalate too far.

The recent invasion of genetically enhanced crustaceans on the Ebranian island of Magnolia Island is an environmental catastrophe, and the Fredian government wishes to formally apologise, and will continue working together with Ebrana to remove the threat and to ensure the safety of the citizens of both nations.”